Last week my oldest child turned 15 and was desperate to see “The Avengers” since it came out on his birthday weekend. He loves the Marvel Comic movies and begged us to take him to see it. Oh the things we do for our kids. I work every Saturday so we thought we’d go to see the early afternoon movie. HA, our first problem was we thought, it only got worse from there! We show up at the theater thinking we would go see the 2:10 showing, we get up to the window and it’s not showing sold out! My husband tells the woman at the window “3 Adults 1 Child please”, I guess he doesn’t realize that movies no longer charge less for younger kids, they gouge us equally now a days. “The 2:10 showing is sold out” she says as she flips the switch for it to show it’s sold out. “Okay, the 4:00 showing then” he said. “It’s sold out also” and magically it suddenly show’s sold out for it too. Suddenly every showing is now showing “Sold Out”. Now by now y’all know me, and you know I tend to get a little aggravated quickly. I walk away from my husband telling him I’m not going to the midnight showing with 2 kids and that witch behind the counter could have had the “Sold Out” showing before we got to the window. I know she heard me, too bad. So after some discussion he goes to the inside counter and buys 4 tickets for Sunday’s first showing. The guy tells him that people were lining up for seats 2 hours early that day so we should get here early Sunday. It’s the first showing in that theater so we could just wait in the theater. Great, my whole Sunday morning spent sitting in a theater waiting. Have I mentioned to y’all I absolutely despise waiting? Wanna get my BP up, make me wait.
Sunday morning rolls around, we get up dressed and to the theater by 10 am. We are the only people there! NOT one other person shows up until a little after 11, dammit I could have slept in a little longer. Now try sitting in a theater with 2 kids who for the sake of their lives still could not sit still for more then 5 seconds. It’s not fun, in fact I think sitting in a dentist chair might be a little less stressful. By 11:20 the theater is packed, sans the 3 seats beside my husband and one in front of the one beside him. Of course with our luck the seatmate from hell came in and sat beside us. From the moment she sat down she never shut up. First it was applause at the previews for the “Battleship” movie and the comment “Maybe we’ll see him in it”. This comment was in reference to her son who serves in the Navy, I know this because she talked about it, out loud. My husband later asked me “Why in the hell would she think she’d see her son in that movie? Just because he’s in the Navy doesn’t mean he’s in the movie”..lol. All I could think was “the movie has already been shot, if he was in it you would have known by now”. Then the commercial for the Navy the came on.. more applause. Obviously she is a Navy supporter. I told Rob “she likes seamen” and yes I meant it the bad way! LOL.
Now she’s on her cell phone, checking her facebook. Her son (who looked to be 16/17ish) is now being lectured repeatedly how she did not like the comment his friend made on his page. It was rude and uncalled for and she did not appreciate it at all. She told him this no less then 6 times, loudly. Everything she said was loudly, this woman did not have a whisper mode. Now that would have been tolerable if that had been the end of it, but alas… it was not! No, she kept talking, and when she wasn’t talking she was moving. She tossed and turned more in that chair then a baby does when they are in the bed with you. Big EXASPERATED moves too, not just shifting. Then there was the coughing without covering her mouth, the checking of the phone, the more talking, the laughing loudly at scene’s that didn’t call for a LOL. Now, I’m sure your sitting there thinking, lord could she have been any worse? Well yes she could and she was! It was about halfway through the movie and it was potty time for her. When we get up in a crowded theater to use the restroom I think it is safe to say the majority of us will stand but bent over, as we make our way through the isle so that the people behind us won’t have to look around us, right? I thought so. Not this lady, no… She literally.. AND I MEAN LITERALLY climbed over the chair in front of her to get out. I’m sure the man sitting beside that chair enjoyed that leg coming over his head. She didn’t even crouch down to walk out.. nope, loud and proud is defiantly her motto. She comes back and yup, you guessed it, she climbs back up and over the row of seats, this time tripping a little bit on her way back to her seat. Does she sit quietly? No, haven’t you been reading this? This woman does nothing quietly, lol.. Nope she plops herself down and begins talking, coughing, moving. It just kept going on and on and on. I told my husband early in the movie that I could smack her with my flip flop, right across the face. But he wouldn’t let me. He wouldn’t let me say anything either. He gets embarrassed when I speak my mind. I must really love him because I kept my mouth shut. But that didn’t keep me from snapping her picture to post for everyone to see. J What can I say, I am who I am.
Take a good look.. if you see this woman sit beside you.. MOVE QUICKLY..
On a side note, the movie was excellent.. RDJ is still amazingly hot and talented!