It’s true, I’m not special

Last week (at least I think it was last week, don’t hold me to it) I read a blog that talked about how the author wasn’t special, as 99% of the world.  At first I thought, how sad is it that this person views the world this way, and themselves.  I mean, everyone is special in some way, right?  They talked about how everyone thinks their children are special but the reality was they weren’t.  Their kids weren’t going to grow up and develop world peace, no statue were going to be dedicated to them, there was not going to be any Federal Holiday dedicated to them.  Those kids were not going to grow up and cure cancer, or become rich and famous, that in fact they would probably live the same ordinary lives that their family before them had.  Grow up, get married, have kids, probably divorce then re-marry and just try hard to etch out a life for them.  After finishing this blog my heart kind of hurt for the writer, well not only the writer but for myself as well because I could understand what he was saying.

Honestly, are we really special?  What are we doing with our everyday life that makes us any more special then the person who sits next to us on the metro, or the guy who is making his way through rush hour traffic to get to his job that he hates to make the money to pay to support his kids?  I’m guessing nothing.  There are those few that dedicate their lives to helping others, nurses, doctors, police, firemen, military personnel ect. Those people are in fact special.  Me personally, I work for a CDL training school.  I’m a paper pusher, my job is not special, and after this last few years I have decided I am not special.  I’m sure my husband and kids would disagree with that but the truth is the truth.  So now that I have figured this out, does it change anything?  No, it doesn’t.  I wasn’t special yesterday, last week, last year and I won’t be tomorrow, next week or next year.  I am just who I am, and that’s all I’ll ever be.  I continue to work to support my babies, try to give them so much more then I did (although I’m failing miserable at that) and live life day to day.  It’s all I can do, it’s all anyone can do.  Sure there will be special moments, but that doesn’t make us special.

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12 thoughts on “It’s true, I’m not special

  1. Shannon I gotta disagree with that. You are a daughter and a princess of the almighty king. Who are we to deem what God sees as special. We are building our treasures in heaven not here in the eartly realm. So continue to speak truths into ppls lives. You will never know about something you say or do can save them from themselves wether your family or friends. We are pretty special ppl. Who care what the world thinks. Personally I find you and Robert pretty dang special

    • I was not referring to God or heaven.. I’m talking about here on earth. I know God see’s as all as special, just like all parents see their own kids as special. But the truth is, I’m not.. and I def don’t feel like I am and haven’t for a long time my friend.

  2. I have to disagree too. It’s not about being special in the worlds eyes. Becoming a doctor, lawyer, or being in the military to be special because that’s what the world says is what makes a person special. I was in the military and you said that makes me special. Your wrong it doesn’t. What makes someone special is if the people we love think we are special. If they saw we are, then we are.

    • That is what we’d all like to believe.. but sometimes it’s just not how your feel.. and when the world keeps shitting all over you.. you finally have to accept the fact that your not special.. I know I”m not..

  3. I understand how you feel,and I think everyone feels this way from time to time. Honestly though, how do you know if someone is “special”? Nobody can really see it, it’s not like a badge you wear around, it’s more of a feeling and feelings can change. Today you might not feel special, but don’t lose hope that tomorrow you just might.

  4. In that case your ex husband and the conservative jerk who is your coworker have won hands down. They no longer need bother to attack you for you have internalized their negativity and beating yourself over the head with it. I don’t call that surviving by any means. 😦

    • It’s not just those two individuals, it’s life itself. No matter how hard I try.. I can never get ahead.. I followed all the rules, did everything right and look where I am.. This world has proved that I am not special. I will have special moments but thats it.

  5. My wife and I are having a hard time too. In fact my overtime is all that is standing between us and loosing our home. Throughout our thirty plus years of marriage we’ve had both good and bad times but so far have made it through them. And there have been many times that either one of us could have lost our lives on the road through the stupidity of other drivers. The year before the great recession my wife survived a brain aneurism. All my life I’ve fought depression and there are many times that I just want to lay down and cry – throw in my towel. Hardly a day goes by that I don’t think about taking my own life yet I’m still here hanging on through the bad times while looking forward to the good times to come. Thank-full that my wife and son are still with me – we are still in our home and that I have a good paying job with overtime and an employer who appreciates what I do and tells me so.

    Now you have a husband and children who love you. Your still employed. You have a talent for writing and you aren’t mean to your stepdaughters nor do you interfere with their relationship with their father and instead of complaining that your husband went off alone to pick up his daughters you were worried that he make it there and back ok. – that alone makes you UNIQUE and SPECIAL in my book – Yes I know that your car broke down but your husband did make it back home.

    Best of all here is a great big cyber {{{{{{{{{{HUG}}}}}}}}}} to make you feel better. Well maybe not best of all since I’ve certain that nobody could ever hug you as good as your husband and children in real time. 🙂

    .

    • Thank you DaPoet.. That was very nice to read. I understand the depression thing, I do believe I have told you before that I suffer myself and have my whole life. It’s very hard on yourself and the one’s who love you.. You are very fortunate to have your wife and son.. May you 3 have years of happiness and less and less troubles.

  6. You may not always feel special or unique or different, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t. Every person has certain characteristics & mannerisms that are unique only to them… There are reasons why people in your life have chosen to give their love to you & not other people. Of course it also doesn’t matter what other people say…you’ll believe what you choose to…but think about this… Do you think every couple blogs? Or banters the way you & Rob do? Do you think everyone else would leave us all so constantly & consistently entertained? 😉

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