Today I came into work after being off yesterday to find the biggest idiot I work with made a total mess of several things because he’s too stupid to remember correctly or even write it down since he can’t remember it. He also loves to say it wasn’t his fault as obviously I (or whoever he may be arguing with at that moment) stated the information to him incorrectly to begin with and now we are changing our story. Logic would state that if you tell this to someone more then oh say 100 times, it’s you that is wrong, not everyone else, but then logic is not a friend of this guys so he remains clueless. Anyways… I figured I’d make up a list of 10 things I’d rather be doing today then dealing with this moron who is making my job a pain in the ass.
1) Going to the dentist! You see, some of you may think that isn’t so bad and for the most part it isn’t, however, for me it is. I hate mouth pain! I turn into the biggest whiniest baby when I have a toothache or an earache. These two things drop me like my ghetto neighbor drops out kids!
2) Listening to an entire Adele CD. Okay sure, she has a great voice and all but have you listened to the words to her songs? They make no sense to me at all. I mean if some dude dropped you and then is remarrying why on earth would you go to his wedding and tell him oh I’ll just go find someone like you???? Her lyrics drive me insane.
3) Watch any of the reality shows like Big Ang.. WHO THE HELL thought it was a good idea to give this woman (and yeah I know she doesn’t look very feminine other then the big fake boobs) her own show? I watched about 5 minutes of it and wanted to sue the makers of the show for my time.
4) Preparing for a colonoscopy.. anyone who has ever had this test done will get this one! If not watch this link.
5) Having my vajayjay waxed. Nuff said.
6) Anything that has to do with my husbands ex wife Babzilla. Well wait now, that’s a close one.. I may rather deal with this idiot then that idiot.
7) Eating okra. This vegetable is disgusting. I cannot get past the slime to eat it. I mean WTH, you can batter and fry the crap out of this little green dagger and it’s still slimy on the inside. How do you people eat that? Bleck.
8) Have to sit and listen to a political debate. Face it, they are all liars and are only saying what they think we want to hear. We all know they don’t plan on ever holding up their promises. Kinda like my ex husband, he was a lying non promise keeping pos too.
9) Move to Alaska. Last year I lost 100lbs and suddenly became allergic to cold weather. If it drops below 80 I’m chilled, below 70 I’m cold, below 60 and I’m a Popsicle. I apparently lost my insulation and now I cannot tolerate the cold at all. It’s gotten so bad that it can be 100 degrees outside but if I’m going into a store I must have my hoodie, and have on jeans and no tank tops. Could you imagine if I lived where it gets to be 60 below? I would definitely have cabin fever as I would not leave my home until it got back up to at least 30 above, and me with cabin fever??? I think my family would be in serious danger, don’t you?
And finally.. I would rather be in throws of intense labor pushing out a 10 pounder then having to listen to and deal with this moron. That should tell you something right there!