Disclaimer (the following journal entries are all fictional, any resemblance to any person famous or otherwise is completely coincidental ). Also contains X-Rated scenes.. if your EASILY offended.. do yourself a favor and leave this blog.. Thank you.
So I had lunch with Jackson today.. he looked tired. He told me he hasn’t been sleeping.. that he’s worried about me and misses me. He told me that he honestly did not know how that bra got in his house but that after I told him what I found he did some checking and found the lock to his laundry room door had been tampered with. He said he even reported it so that it would be documented if anything else happened. The way he held my hand and looked me directly in the eye’s… I believe him. My heart and head tell me he’s innocent.
I told him that Craig and I have been talking.. at first he was upset.. he kept trying to tell me “After what he did to you.. and put you through.. he doesn’t deserve a second chance”.. but I told him just because I’m talking to him doesn’t mean I’m giving him anything.. that he is still the father of my children and deserves to have me at least talk to him. He said he understood and I made it clear that he will not give me any grief for talking to him.. he didn’t have that right. He backed off of the topic.
Then he just started asking how I was.. how the kids were.. he kept telling me that he missed me. One thing that got me was he mentioned that “Shane” has been doing drive by’s to keep an eye on the place for him.. I asked him why he was having Shane do it and not him.. he said because I told him to leave and he wanted to do what I said but he still wanted to make sure I was okay and being protected… I told him to stop it.. I don’t trust Shane.. at all and I don’t like him. That he knew that… I don’t know why he’d ask him to do that.
He walked me to my car and told me to make sure I locked the doors and take different paths.. to constantly change up my routine. Then he kissed me… At first I kind of pulled away.. but dammit.. I’ve missed him.. his touch.. I swear I’m addicted to him… He asked to see me one night this week… I told him I had to think about it.. my body misses his touch.. I could use a release.. God.. what am I thinking????