My Mind is Running Faster than NASCAR on Sundays

I hate days like today!  I want to scream, I want to cry, I want to run and hide from the world because day’s like today make me feel like the world just doesn’t want me here.  This is what Bi Polar disorder is.  I didn’t have a bad day, in fact I had a good day. Work went smoothly even though it was a class start and a testing day.  I chatted with a friend who made me smile. really a good day so what does my brain do?  Well it just says “nope.. not going to let you just have a good day because that’s not possible”  I have so many thoughts running through my head it’s hard to just grab one and think about it. Everything everyone is posting on Facebook is just annoying me to no end, I’m upset with the way my life is going.  I’m thinking about the mistakes I’ve made, the choices that lead me to where I am.  The what if’s driving me mad.  SOMEONE PLEASE STOP MY BRAIN BEFORE THE WORDS ESCAPE MY MOUTH!  I truly hate being bi polar.  I really really hate it.  I just want to disappear.  My mouth wants to tell people off but I can’t do that because they’ve done nothing wrong. At least I’m not so severe that I do go through with every thought in my head.

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